Doubt in myself leads the way
Insecurities carved in stone
Not sure of the truth in what others say
Thanking them for their care, their kindness unknown
Will I ever stop tearing myself down everyday?
In my mind, thoughts always churn
Am I good enough? Will I ever be?
Maybe I should wait for fate to take another turn
Am I smart enough? Will I ever be?
The fire of indecision, am I going to burn?
Making choices is a chore, which way to go?
Afraid to choose, if I am wrong I can't restart like a game
Doubt, choices, chilling my blood and making my brain slow
Picking wrong would be bad, if I don't, will I stay the same?
Or will I be changed like a feather by a careless blow?
If right or wrong, will I survive?
My heart says yes, my brain strongly disagrees
If I go down, is there anyone who will revive?
All I want is to be truly me
But isn't that like taking a blindfolded, head first dive?
I know that feeling this makes me a coward
Each day facing the world feeling listless
Not ready to move when over me shadows have towered
Afraid to move even though I am in a bath of souring piss
How can I go on while feeling less empowered?
So if you see me in a corner weeping
I have a choice to make, please make my choice
Because through my eyes, my courage is leaking
So please choose and give my cowardness a voice
Will you stand by me when the choice starts reaping?
©Josh West
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