Trapped in a routine, alive but not living
Wishing more and more to never wake again
To be washed down time's consuming drain
Taking all blame for issues the world is giving
My worthless life measured on one sandy grain
A longing felt, the need for something more
Eyes have developed that desperate stare
Now willing to do anything as a deadly dare
Let me neglect my wellbeing and infect my core
Let me revoke myself through my lunatic care
Been clean for years, but the urge has returned
Now something is needed to vitalise my weary soul
I know I am burying myself in the deepest hole
The euphoria I once had was a great gift earned
If I go down that road will I come back whole?
Mind begging to find some snow, to ride the rail
My heart fighting to hold back the confusion
Relapse possible, no thought of any absolution
But am I able to control it or am I now to frail?
Is this it? Am I going to find my chemical solution?
©Josh West
Picture credit: cartoonstock
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